Game of friends 

I’ve not watched Game of Thrones properly, but I know the general gist consists of pretty barbaric power struggles. The same can be said between a girl and her girlfriends – only less blood and baby eating (spoiler alert) and more cat fights and Regina George esk bitching. 

Thankfully we grow out of it. Only, nobody really talks about not having friends… yet it’s probably the most important thing in our lives. Even more important than a romantic relationship – yet sometimes it can take a while for that to twig. Hence the cat fights and Mean Girls stint. 

I’ve grown up feeling like I’ve pretty much failed as a friend. Because I didn’t take big groups with me as I grew up. 

We’re taught to look at other peoples’ lives on social media and feel insecure. We measure our success on how many people we have around us to put in our profile pictures and tag in statuses. 

But from my experience, surely quality over quantity is what really counts. When I left uni I lost touch with the majority of my mates. And that felt pretty crap for a long time. 

It felt like a break up, but worse because it’s pretty personal. You get used to being around a big group of mates, then you move, they move, you all grow up and life becomes a little lonely. 

The irony is, whilst I was feeling like a failed person for not being in touch with some of my mates. I was confinding in my mates about it. And making new ones. 

I’ve come to accept that you have friends and ‘friends’ – basically people who you click with and people you get on with – and that’s OK. We all need friends and ‘friends’. And even better, sometimes the people you’d never dream of becoming close to become the best friends and people you thought you’d be glued to for the rest of your life become people you had a great time with, but you lost touch with. And again, that’s OK. 

I can count people I regard as friends on my fingers and toes and I actually think that’s pretty good going. Because a couple of years back I could only count on one hand. 

They have been with me through my ups and downs and they make me feel good. 

So, if you’re feeling a little down about not having a big group of friends, don’t. Take a look at the people you do have and enjoy them. Don’t beat yourself up because, having spoken to my friends, we’ve all been there, we all get lonely and we’ve all had a scraping with a Mean Girl from time to time. Hell you might even be someone else’s Mean Girl! 

So, here’s to friendship, happiness and general good times! 

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