Yep, that was me last week. I got all smug that I was now a happy person I forgot that I’m also a human being and it’s OK to feel shit at times. So I pulled a standard Ella, pretended to be OK, felt like an accomplished independent woman for a day, got ratty with people I love, burst into tears over sweet fuck all – making me look like a bigger knob. Confessed to what was wrong to one person, thought it was sorted, carried on being a dick, pissed off someone you really don’t want to piss off and then end up in a crying mess at their feet saying sorry whilst saying thank you for being a good friend and calling me on my bullshit.
Thankfully I have got amazing friends and it turns out that, whilst my shit week was shit, it taught me a couple of key lessons.
– Stop being a cocky shit, just because you went to therapy doesn’t mean you’re void from feeling crap from time to time. And that’s OK
– Talk to your friends. They know you better than you know yourself so don’t try and be OK when you’re not OK
– Don’t feel bad about feeling bad. I feel great after a girly weekend and being honest about how I feel. But it took some getting there. If I’d have been honest with myself from the offset – it would have been a lot easier
So, you can be OK and still feel shit at times. As long as you get over it, you’re good for the time being. Don’t stress about having emotions – especially around the good old P time of the month (ain’t no therapy sorting that shit out).